Caring

We have Dilbert checks that consist of four different pictures from the famous cartoon strip by Scott Adams.

Today, when I opened the checkbook to pay another bill, I noticed this quote from Dogbert: “Did you know that pretending to care looks just like caring?”

It made me think.

Is there a difference between pretending to care and actually caring? And does it really matter?

Religious traditions differ in many ways, sometimes significantly. But there’s a common thread that runs through them: intention, change from the inside out, that leads to “good works” (in the Christian tradition) and loving-kindness, which leads to Right Action (in the Buddhist tradition).

In Buddhism, this is addressed in the second of the Noble Eightfold Path: Right Intention (also known as Right Thinking, Right Thought, or Right Aspiration).

Right Intention precedes right action, an idea expressed in the first three lines of the Dhammapada (translation: Thomas Byrom):

We are what we think
All that we are arises with our thoughts.
With our thoughts we make the world.

The idea that outside changes are proceeded by inside changes is a thread that runs throughout the New Testament of the Bible, the result of which appears most notably in Galatians 5:22-23:

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law. (ESV)

To embody and exemplify the fruit of the Spirit, according to the Christian tradition, Continue reading

Moments

“Every morning, when we wake up, we have twenty-four brand-new hours to live. What a precious gift! We have the capacity to live in a way that these twenty-four hours will bring peace, joy, and happiness to ourselves and others…we need only to be awake, alive in the present moment.”
– Thich Nhat Hanh (Peace is Every Step: The Path of Mindfulness in Everyday Life, p. 5)

Have you ever noticed when you’re out on the trail, people heading in the opposite direction — be they fellow biker, walker, or runner — smile and say “Hi”?

That’s because, as Mother Theresa wrote (No Greater Love, p. 93), “Poverty doesn’t only consist of being hungry for bread, but rather it is a tremendous hunger for human dignity. We need to love and to be somebody for someone else.”

For whatever reason, when people are out doing similar things they’re more receptive to the greeting of a stranger. It’s like there’s some unspoken camaraderie shared between them — but it’s a camaraderie, whether they realize it or not, that runs far deeper than merely wearing the same running outfits or riding the same Diamondback bikes.

The Dalai Lama (The Essential Dalai Lama: His Important Teachings, pages 7, 8) wrote:

For my part, meeting innumerable others from all over the world and from every walk of life reminds me of our basic sameness as human beings. Indeed, the more I see of the world, the clearer it becomes that no matter what our situation, whether we are rich or poor, educated or not, of one race, gender, religion or another, we all desire to be happy and to avoid suffering.

I believe that — which is why a smile, a nod, or a simple wave of the hand can sometimes be a powerful way to help someone be happy. It only takes a moment, maybe even a split second. But it may be the most beneficial few seconds in someone’s day.