Simplicity

Wonji Dharma, a very dear friend of mine, posted a video titled “If You Give A Little Love, You Will Get A Little Love” to his blog (called Zen Mirror) today, along with these words:

there is only one reform in life
and that is to become more loving.
it is so simple to do something kind
or take a moment out of a busy day
to stop and notice what is around us
yet we blindly follow our lives
lost in our thinking
about this or that
and don’t see it when
that small gesture
or that passing smile
might not change
the expression of
life all around.
we are all interconnected
we are one planet and one species
that carries the future
in our hands,
just pay attention
and you will know
the right thing to do.

Sikh

goldentempleWe recently befriended a kind and gregarious man who lives in our city and owns a restaurant/CD/movie/grocery store.

Earlier this week, we ate in his restaurant for the first time. It won’t be the last. It was the most delicious Indian food we’ve ever tasted. We also bought a Bollywood movie he recommended. Before we left, I asked him his name. He said it’s Singh and he’s a Sikh from Punjab, India. He said God named him.

That intrigued me.

Today, we returned to purchase a bunch of Indian spices. That’s when I asked him about his religion. He beamed and excitedly moved from one pile to another of CDs and DVDs, playing excerpts for us, translating now and then. He showed us his holy books, and he gave us a book called Pearls of Sikhism published by the Sikh Missionary Center. He said I should learn Punjabi so that I could read his holy book.

Before we left today (laden with spices and the book), he invited us to visit his Sikh temple. We may take him up on it, even though we’ll likely not understand much of what’s spoken during the service. It’s just incredibly fulfilling to learn about other people, and what they believe.

The late Stephen R. Covey’s book The 7 Habits Of Highly Effective People has kept me in good stead over the years, especially Habit 5, which is:

Seek First to Understand, Then to be Understood

“Use empathic listening to be genuinely influenced by a person, which compels them to reciprocate the listening and take an open mind to being influenced by you. This creates an atmosphere of caring, and positive problem solving.”

I’ve discovered the best way to build bridges and forge friendships is to begin with questions, not statements. Asking and listening is a wonderful way to demonstrate compassion and respect — especially when encountering people from different religious traditions.

That’s the mission of The Only Love Project.

Jesus and Buddha

We have many guides to show us what only-love mind looks like in action.

Here are just two:

JESUS

And he opened his mouth and taught them, saying:
“Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
“Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted.
“Blessed are the meek, for they shall inherit the earth.
“Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they shall be satisfied.
“Blessed are the merciful, for they shall receive mercy.
“Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God.
“Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called sons of God.
“Blessed are those who are persecuted for righteousness’ sake, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
“Blessed are you when others revile you and persecute you and utter all kinds of evil against you falsely on my account. Rejoice and be glad, for your reward is great in heaven, for so they persecuted the prophets who were before you.

(Matthew 5:2-12 ESV)

You have heard that it was said, ‘An eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth.’ But I say to you, Do not resist the one who is evil. But if anyone slaps you on the right cheek, turn to him the other also. And if anyone would sue you and take your tunic, let him have your cloak as well. And if anyone forces you to go one mile, go with him two miles. Give to the one who begs from you, and do not refuse the one who would borrow from you.

(Matthew 5:38-46 ESV)

__________

BUDDHA

“Look how he abused me and beat me,
How he threw me down and robbed me.”
Live with such thoughts and you live in hate.

“Look how he abused me and beat me,
How he threw me down and robbed me.”
Abandon such thoughts, and live in love.

In this world
Hate never yet dispelled hate.
Only love dispels hate.
This is the law,
Ancient and inexhaustible.

(Dhammapada, chapter 1)

__________

To embrace only-love mind means to endure what faces you, and to withhold retaliation. It means, to use the famous phrase, to turn the other cheek.

Such behavior is radical, especially in this quick-tempered world in which we live. But it is the way that brings peace.

And healing.

It is the way of Only Love.

Inspiration

There can be no excuse for us if we do not embrace the path of love.

There have many who have gone before us, who have left behind their wisdom for us to ponder.

“Mankind has to get out of violence only through non-violence. Hatred can be overcome only by love. Counter-hatred only increases the surface as well as the depth of hatred.”

– Mahatma Gandhi

“The nonviolent approach does not immediately change the heart of the oppressor. It first does something to the hearts and souls of those committed to it. It gives them new self-respect; it calls up resources of strength and courage that they did not know they had. Finally it reaches the opponent and so stirs his conscience that reconciliation becomes a reality.”

– Martin Luther King, Jr.

“I’ve decided that I’m going to do battle for my philosophy. You ought to believe something in life, believe that thing so fervently that you will stand up with it till the end of your days. I can’t make myself believe that God wants me to hate. I’m tired of violence. And I’m not going to let my oppressor dictate to me what method I must use. We have a power, power that can’t be found in Molotov cocktails, but we do have a power. Power that cannot be found in bullets and guns, but we have a power. It is a power as old as the insights of Jesus of Nazareth and as modern as the techniques of Mahatma Gandhi.”

– Martin Luther King, Jr.

“From whence comes love, where does it have its origin and its source; where is the place, its stronghold, from which it proceeds? Certainly this place is hidden or is in that which is hidden. There is a place in a human being’s most inward depths; from this place proceeds the life of love.”

– Søren Kierkegaard

“Let us not use bombs and guns to overcome the world. Let us use love and compassion. Peace begins with a smile. Smile five times a day at someone you don’t really want to smile at at all. Do it for peace. Let us radiate the peace of God and so light His light and extinguish in the world and in the hearts of all men all hatred and love for power.”

– Mother Teresa

The Mission Field of Love

What color is love?

What is its gender?

Does it have an age?

Does it have a political affiliation?

Does it even have to be reserved for human beings?

Love can be bestowed upon everyone, or upon any living creature. For example, if you don’t get out much, and don’t know anyone, but you have a dog or cat, you be love for your four-legged companion.

That’s a no-brainer for most people. Especially people with pets. But here’s one that isn’t so obvious: the Internet.

The Internet is — to use a Christian term — a mission field that stretches, literally, around the world.

One way to be love is to not get embroiled in squabbles online. Don’t ramp up arguments to the point where Facebook friends react by blocking/banning other Facebook friends.

How do you do that? By not taking sides. By not drawing a line in the sand that says, in effect, “THIS is what I know to be true. YOUR way is wrong.” Doing that immediately bifurcates reality. It creates an us and them. My way, or your way. That’s where animosity begins.

You’ve seen it. The anger. The heated arguments in Facebook posts. There are some nasty people — who may not even be truly nasty offline, in person — who are trying so hard to make their ideological points that they lose the ability to be kind. It exists on both sides of the political aisle, too. I’ve seen “Liberals” who are extremely angry and bitter against those who don’t share their views. Likewise, I’ve seen “Conservatives” who are dead-sure those on the other side of the aisle are hastening America’s demise. The chasm between them seems too vast to be bridged.

Maybe it is. But it’s worth a try to bridge it. And one way to accomplish that is to keep only-love mind.

That means to be mindful of what you say and do in your world, where you are.

So if, where you are, is sitting in front of a computer, or standing in line with your smartphone in hand, you can practice only-love mind by keeping your fingers from typing words that divide, rather than unite.